(へんとう)(こま)

へんとうにこまる
expression
to be at a loss for an answer; to not know what to say
1. to be at a loss for an answer; to be stumped; to not know how to respond
The state of being unable to come up with an appropriate reply, either because the question is difficult, the situation is awkward, or one does not want to give a direct answer.
返答(へんとう)(こま)って(だま)ってしまった。
I was at a loss for words and fell silent.
(きゅう)にそんなことを()かれても返答(へんとう)(こま)る。
Even if you suddenly ask me something like that, I don't know what to say.
上司(じょうし)から転勤(てんきん)(はなし)()ちかけられ、返答(へんとう)(こま)った。
When my boss brought up the idea of a transfer, I didn't know how to respond.

A natural expression combining 返答(へんとう) (reply, response) with に(こま)る (to be troubled by). It describes the uncomfortable moment of not being able to produce an appropriate answer — whether due to the difficulty of the question, social pressure, or a desire to avoid giving a direct reply.

USAGE:

  • Often used when someone is put on the spot or asked an awkward question
  • Can describe both genuine difficulty and diplomatic evasion

COMMON COLLOCATIONS:

  • 返答(へんとう)(こま)って(だま)る: to fall silent, at a loss for words
  • 返答(へんとう)(こま)質問(しつもん): a question one struggles to answer

SIMILAR EXPRESSIONS:

  • 言葉(ことば)()まる: to be at a loss for words — focuses on the physical sensation of words not coming out
  • (こた)えに(きゅう)する: to be hard-pressed for an answer — more formal and literary
  • (くち)ごもる: to mumble; to hesitate in speaking — describes the visible behavior rather than the internal state