甘(あま)え

あまえ
noun
dependence on others' indulgence; spoiled behavior; presuming on goodwill
emotion
1. dependence on others' indulgence; presuming on goodwill
The expectation or desire that others will be tolerant, forgiving, or accommodating. A key cultural concept describing the psychology of relying on another's benevolence, famously analyzed in Doi Takeo's 'The Anatomy of Dependence.'
子(こ)どもの甘(あま)えを受(う)け止(と)める。
To accept a child's need for dependence.
親(おや)への甘(あま)えが抜(ぬ)けていない。
He still hasn't outgrown his dependence on his parents.
日本(にほん)の人間関係(にんげんかんけい)には甘(あま)えの構造(こうぞう)があると言(い)われている。
It is said that Japanese interpersonal relationships are built on amae, a structure of presuming on others' goodwill.
2. spoiled behavior; self-indulgence; lack of self-discipline
Acting in a way that takes advantage of lenient conditions or avoids facing difficulties. Often used critically to describe someone who is not taking responsibility.
それは甘(あま)えだ。
That's just being soft on yourself.
甘(あま)えを捨(す)てて自立(じりつ)しなさい。
Stop relying on others and become independent.
社会人(しゃかいじん)になったのだから、もう甘(あま)えは許(ゆる)されない。
Now that you're a working adult, self-indulgence is no longer acceptable.

Noun form of the verb 甘(あま)える (to behave in a spoiled way; to depend on someone's kindness). A culturally significant concept in Japanese psychology, explored in 土居(どい)健郎(たけお)'s 1971 book 『甘(あま)えの構造(こうぞう)』 (The Anatomy of Dependence). The concept has no direct English equivalent.

Sense 1 is neutral or positive — the natural human desire for closeness and acceptance, especially in parent-child or intimate relationships. Sense 2 is negative — a failure to stand on one's own.

Common collocations

Similar words

  • わがまま: selfishness — focuses on imposing one's will on others, whereas 甘(あま)え is about expecting indulgence
  • 依存(いぞん): dependence — clinical/neutral term for relying on something, without the psychological nuance of 甘(あま)え
  • 甘(あま)やかす: to spoil/pamper — describes the action of the person who indulges another's 甘(あま)え

Related Words

Compare: わがまま (selfishness)
Compare: 依存(いぞん) (dependence)
Compare: 甘(あま)やかす (to spoil/pamper)
Compare: 甘(あま)やかし (spoiling)
general
Added 2026.5.8 20:10 · Revised 2026.10.12 9:41
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