大人(おとな)しい

大人(おとな)しい means quiet, gentle, or well-behaved.

Writing

Despite the kanji 大人(おとな) (adult), this word means 'gentle/quiet', not 'adult-like'. Often written in hiragana.

Range of use

• People and animals: not noisy, not troublesome, doing as told. Of children and pets this is straightforward praise; of an adult it describes a reserved, unassertive temperament.
• Colors, patterns, and clothes: subdued, understated. おとなしい色(いろ) is a muted color, not a silent one.
• Actions, via the adverbial おとなしく: doing something without resisting or making a fuss, which is why it turns up both in instructions to children and in descriptions of giving in.

Similar words

• 静(しず)か: quiet in the sense of little sound. Describes places and moments; おとなしい describes character and conduct, so a noisy room can be full of おとなしい people.
• 穏(おだ)やか: calm, mild. Praises an even temper with none of the passivity おとなしい can suggest.
• 従順(じゅうじゅん): obedient. Formal, and explicitly about submitting to authority.

Common patterns

• おとなしくする: to behave, be quiet
• おとなしい性格(せいかく): gentle personality
• おとなしい色(いろ): subdued color

Usage

Generally positive, but of an adult it can hint at passivity or at not speaking up. In a job reference or a self-description it is rarely read as a compliment; 穏(おだ)やか is the safer choice for a calm temperament.